Bitch & Swap: Get Your Gab and Clothes for FREE!
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This idea was shared with me by a great and talented friend of mine who started her first Bitch & Swap session a decade ago, and raves about the friendships she’s tightened and forged over the years. And the great apparel…You Will Need:
- FRIENDS: Those ladies you love but might not see very often. Those busy, talented, intelligent women from all walks of life who are sassy and fabulous, but who, perhaps for those aforementioned reasons, you can never seem to get to sit down for a cup of coffee.
- CLOTHES: old, new, forgotten, useless, too small, too big, weird, and/or beautiful.
- AN AFTERNOON FREE: The hardest part about this delicate recipe. Pick a date six months in advance. If one of your best buds can’t come, no worries! Have another Bitch & Swap session in 6 more months she can come to.
Optional:
-LIQUOR: The swappin’ just gets funnier.
-HOR D’OEUVRES: Everything’s better with mini hot dogs.
- GOOD MUSIC: Enough said.
The Gist:
A true Bitch & Swap session is exactly what it sounds like. You Bitch, then you Swap. Clothes, to be exact!
Invite all your best buds over for a nice afternoon get-together. Be sure to invite some of those women who you get along with great, but can never seem to find time/energy/a non-lame reason to grab coffee. Ideally, you want 8-10 women from all backgrounds and all different professions, even if they aren’t friends themselves. You can be the tie that binds! Just make sure the ladies you invite all bring a positive energy and a fun-loving spirit of adventure. You don’t want no bitches at your Bitch & Swap!
Tell the ladies to go through their closets and bring all the clothes they don’t want/can’t decide if it fits them anymore/things from 1982 they should really probably throw out but never have. Shoes, bags, bras, dresses, hats, scarves, lingerie is ALL welcome.
Set up shop in your bedroom (don’t be shy, it’s just us girls here!) Invite everyone in, serve ‘em some champagne or perhaps a nice spritzer (it is the afternoon, after all) and spread out your goods. Then…trade! That’s right, you trade your clothes with your girlfriends! It’s cheaper than a shopping splurge (uh yeah…it’s FREE!) and more fun, because these women will tell you what they really and truly think about your old and your new clothing! Aaaand, while you Swap you simultaneously (have you guessed it?!) BITCH!!! About anything and everything! All topics are fair game in your Bedroom of Barter. (Just make sure no one is bitchin’ about each other, that’s not cool…)
Well, ladies, that’s it for today. Now go out there, round up some awesome hot mamas, and get to Bitchin’ and Swappin’!
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Lately a lot of famous married men seem to be stepping out on their wives—and getting caught. The main reason they get caught is that the women they’re cheating with rat them out to the press. Who know why guys like Tiger Woods, Jesse James and David Boreanaz have steak at home, but insist on going out for dogburgers? But the motives of their consorts are pretty obvious—fame and money. The press insists on referring to these women as “mistresses.”
In days of old, a “mistress” was a woman who was “kept” by a married man, often a wealthy one. The “other woman” respected her man’s wife and family, and in return for being supported in style, she kept her mouth shut. The wife often knew about the mistress, but as long as she had the name, the house and the children, she also stayed quiet. Obviously, the new breed of “mistress” has little in common with her classier forerunners.
There are better terms to describe the strippers, nightclub hostesses, cocktail waitresses and porn stars who’ve mined their indiscretions for big bucks payoffs—like hooker, whore, skank and slut. I wish the media would stop honoring these calculating bimbos with the term “mistress” and call them what they really are.
“Mistress” or Whore?
Submit a question to the writers or submit a Cat Fight
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March 2, 2009 at 6:57 pm
That sounds like fun, and practical, too. I wish I had more friends who wear the same size I do!
March 31, 2009 at 5:15 pm
Thanks to this great read by Teresa my girlfriends and I are having out 1st “bitch and Swap” this weekend. I am really excited, just getting together with the girls will be great. I bet we do more “bitch’n” than anything.
April 30, 2009 at 7:18 pm
I cannot tell you how much fun reading this post has been and more importantly how effective it has become part of my fun with friends. Going on round 2 of the “bitch and swap” this weekend.
May 1, 2009 at 9:55 pm
I am SO glad to hear that, ladies! There’s nothing quite like a good Bitch and Swap session…I’m happy to share the good times (and good clothes) with you!